The Beauty in Things I Could Complain About

The Beauty in Letting it Go

October 13, 2013
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There are certain dreams I have had for years.  I can paint the picture so vividly about how they work out and how they end with happily ever after.  We, sometimes, get our hands on a notion of love, career, direction and struggle with adapting it or, releasing it all together.  Often times we will choose to try again with a different approach or from another angle and when we are shown, repeatedly, that it does not work, we bang our heads in frustration, but then we are reminded of the Beauty: the Beauty in finally seeing the light, the Beauty in  finding the way that is less challenging, the Beauty in getting what is truly for you, the Beauty in not wasting anymore time, the Beauty in not being trapped by the idea of happily ever after, the Beauty in letting it go.Let it go


The Beauty in Life Not Being What You Anticipated

September 30, 2013
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Contrary to music lyrics, my thirties do not feel like my twenties.  All of the hard work invested in my youth did not set me up to live lavishly.  My overpriced education did not bring me a six-figure income.  The marriage and children and the house did not bring the fulfillment or love that was in the storybooks.  Often times we look at our present and reflect on our past and conclude, boy oh boy, this was not what I expected.  With observations we can become frustrated or even saddened, but then we are reminded of the Beauty: the Beauty in it being more than you desired (sometimes); the Beauty in the surprises that life brings; the Beauty in the confines of life not being so reliable; the Beauty in life being long and having the opportunity to shape it how you want; the Beauty in the unknown; the Beauty in life not being what you anticipated.Image

The Beauty in Going Back on a Decision

September 11, 2013
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There are decisions in your life that you make and once made, you cannot go back. The option is not even there. Then, there are others. These decisions can vary in severity and importance.  My three year old daughter goes back on her outfit selection about 8 times a morning and at the end of the evening, I am left to pick up the non-selected items that have been strewn throughout the floor.  Several months ago, I made a hard decision, an important decision, a decision that I do not doubt was correct, not even once; however, that did not alter me exhibiting behavior that supported the alternate decision. Often times, when you go back on a decision, your integrity can be questioned and the certainty and validity of the original decision is weakened, but then you are reminded of the beauty: the Beauty in strengthening your stance, the Beauty in being able to not question yourself because you have seen the other side, the Beauty in showing yourself grace, the Beauty in being able to turn it back (again), the Beauty in being flexible because life requires it, the Beauty in going back on a decision.change_mind

The Beauty in Being Swamped

August 22, 2013
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My phone rang today approximately 23 times.  I placed another 14 calls.  I sent text messages about my daughter’s 3rd birthday party, shopped around for a photographer for the wedding I am coordinating, and reviewed a menu, guest list, and invitations for a baby shower I am planning for my sister in law.  By midday, my children were antsy and asking, “mom, can we go outside NOW?” I made three meals, cleaned up after all of them and did, in fact, take the kids out for a long walk and fresh air.  Often times when we are busy we may be overwhelmed and stressed, but then we are reminded of the Beauty: the Beauty in productivity, the Beauty in time passing quickly, the Beauty in unlimited texts, minutes and data, the Beauty in children seeing an example of work, the Beauty in seeing your capacity, the Beauty in a hard day’s work, the Beauty in being swamped.being-busy

The Beauty in Being Jaded

August 19, 2013
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I spoke with a friend of mine who is on his way out of a consistently challenging relationship and when discussing the demise, he noted how frustrated he was that he had denied himself and was faithful in spite of all of the temptation that came his way.  I scoffed and lamented, explaining that in the midst of mourning his relationship, he should not regret his good choices, but realize that his opting for monogamy is the standard for being in a relationship.  What followed was a normalcy that I keep facing: that people are seldom faithful and that some men enter into a relationship with little expectation or faith in themselves to have viable, loyal, and truthful relationships.  I got off of the telephone and felt tired of this reality, jaded. Often times we label people as jaded and bitter when they look at the cup of love and relationships with a half-full or even empty mentality, but then we are reminded of the Beauty: the Beauty in jaded meaning that it was well worn, the Beauty in time to rest, the Beauty in seeing things with a different outlook, the Beauty when the jaded is restored, the Beauty in sometimes empty and half-full cups getting full and overflowing, the Beauty in being jaded.Image

The Beauty in Shame On Me

August 2, 2013
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The old saying goes, fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me.  Well, I find myself in shame on me territory with a few different people.  It is quite hurtful and humbling to find yourself misused and betrayed by virtue-less people who have shown themselves to lack integrity before, but for whatever reason, whether it be the obligation, habit, unhealthy emotional connection, you extend yourself again and are met with disappointment and pain.  Often times when this happens, we beat ourselves up and truly do feel the shame that is attached with the poor investments and trust put into the person, but then you are reminded of the Beauty: the Beauty in not being totally jaded, the Beauty in being trusting, the Beauty in knowing the hurt so it is a little easier to get over, the Beauty in having more information about the character of the people you interact with, the Beauty in making new friends, the Beauty in shame on me.foolmetwice

The Beauty in Swimsuit Season

July 8, 2013
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Ahh, summertime, a big girl’s nightmare, right? The heat alone forces you to wear less clothes and the go-to cover-up the bad parts mentality is not really an option.  And then, the same heat and seasonal activities force you to be out in even skimpier attire, showing off more skin.  This can be rather daunting, uncomfortable, and frightening for some.  It could force a woman into her home until Autumn.  I, however, am not the one. I love the pool. I love water.  I love hanging with my friends. And I love whatever it will take to relieve me of being hot. Often times swimsuit season approaches so quickly that you may not have hit all your body goals despite magazine and television propaganda and you may look at yourself in the mirror or in a picture and cringe, but then you are reminded of the Beauty: the Beauty in true self-acceptance, the Beauty in you, the Beauty in different types of bathing suits to attract or detract attention to whatever, the Beauty in not giving a fuck, the Beauty in being able to change something if you don’t like it, the Beauty in swimsuit season.IMG_4164

The Beauty in Dealing With Crazy

July 8, 2013
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I had the pleasure of having a conversation and being told that I was selfish and operating on my own agenda and caring not about the others involved.  I was berated for approximately 20 minutes.  Ten minutes after that, the phone rings, and the same person proceeds to tell me that I need to concern myself with my happiness and make my decisions based on attaining that goal.  Another 20 minutes pass and I get off the call emotionally drained and utterly confused.  Often times when we are met with a person’s instability they can sometimes shake our own foundations and have us think that their delusions are a part of our realities and then we are reminded of the Beauty: the Beauty in crazy feeling crazy so it is easily distinguished, the Beauty in putting no merit in things that don’t make sense, the Beauty in seeing someone’s shortcomings and not feeling compelled to point them out, the Beauty in being apathetic to the crazy critiques of an outside party, the Beauty in professional diagnosis, the Beauty in dealing with crazy.celebrity-pictures-gary-busey-crazy-people

The Beauty in Momentum Being Slow to Gain

July 5, 2013
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When you first start running on a treadmill, you have to ease your way to accelerated speeds or you will trip, slide back and end up on your backside.  When you drive a stick shift, you have to shift into first gear (the hardest of all shift changes in my opinion) and then work your way up before you can get to 3rd, 4th, or 5th gear and coast in higher speeds.  When there are things taking off in our lives the first steps and processes can seem daunting and snail-slow starting.  Often times the journey to the higher speeds in our personal and professional lives require more than a few steps at one pace or even figuring out the balance and finesse of gas and clutch, but then we are reminded of the Beauty: the Beauty in the building, the Beauty in preparing yourself for the steady pace, the Beauty in resting when you can, the Beauty in cherishing the process, the Beauty in that precise moment you feel the change pick up, the Beauty in momentum being slow to gain.Drive-a-Stick-Shift-Car

The Beauty in People Showing Themselves to You

July 4, 2013
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We have all heard the phrase, when people show you who they are, believe them.  This is a suggestion to people who may usually give the benefit of the doubt too frequently, be too trusting, be too forgiving, and/or be too blind to the character flaws of another.  I have yet to hear this phrase in reference to someone’s innate talent, or increasing responsibility or rock solid integrity. Often times, people showing themselves to you is usually in a way that is shameful, unflattering, or immature and we have to remind ourselves of the Beauty: the Beauty in basing choices on facts and not feelings, the Beauty in some things never changing, the Beauty in making decisions on who someone is as opposed to who you wish they were, the Beauty in true character or lack thereof being unable to hide, the Beauty in seeing clearly, the Beauty in people showing themselves to you. Image

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